"The Covenant" (2006)

This is the first time I've watched this. Let's hope it's the last. What, you don't remember "The Covenant"? There's a good reason for that. It is your typical generic teen supernatural action-horror that became all too popular in the mid-2000's trying to capitalize on the popularity of the likes of "Underworld".

Four teenage boys known as the Sons of Ipswich have inherited the powers of their ancestors - 4 witches who hid during the Salem Witch Hunts. The stories all say there are five families, and these kids discover the inheritor of the fifth family and are forced to do battle with it.

"The Covenant" is bad. The plot is weak, the dialogue seems to be written by a 15 year old, and the acting is atrocious. I mean, check out what else the writer has done and you'll agree; he's a bad writer. 

All the male characters have typical rich frat boy, North Shore trendy names like Reid, Chase, and Tyler. All two of the main female characters are only shown talking about boys in their underwear, taking showers while someone watches, and being victims of a plague of spiders.

I'm glad Sebastian Stan learned how to act between this movie and "Captain America" five years later. He is terrible in this movie. He's not alone, either. I don't think there's even a flash of decent acting during the entire 97 minutes of this movie.

Please, skip this. It really is as awful as the reviews say it is. Believe the critics this time, they're actually right. This is garbage, and nothing anyone says will ever change my mind on that. Seriously, we get scenes in the movie that sound like this. Keep in mind, the doctor here is a medical professional, and all these lines are spoken like they're being read off a cue card by a 5th grader.

Doctor: Her temperature's jumped to 105...and she's showing symptoms of anaphylactic shock.
Sarah: What does that mean?
Doctor: It's a severe allergic reaction.
Sarah: To what?
Doctor: We're not sure. It's as if she'd been bitten by hundreds of insects . . . Like spiders.