"Darkness Falls" (2003)

Unfortunately we're not just reviewing the music video by Killswitch Engage. We're reviewing something much, much worse.

Don't believe anything written on this movie case. The quote holds no truth, and I have no idea what the hell that tagline is trying to say.

"Crimson Peak"

To me, "Crimson Peak" was nothing more than a disappointment. I love del Toro. And the promise of him doing a period horror movie starring Tom Hiddleston as the villain was everything I could ask for. Unfortunately for me, "Crimson Peaks" was much less "period horror" and much more "period romance with an occasional ghost". While I can see why some might consider this a good movie, it is not what was sold to me, and I find much of it to be completely unnecessary.

"The Crazies" (2010)

The remake of a 1975 George Romero movie, "The Crazies" follows David (Timothy Olyphant), the sheriff of the all-American town of Ogden Marsh, Iowa. On the opening day of little league, one of the townsfolk inexplicably walks out onto the field with his shotgun, and David is forced to put him down. The next night, another citizen locks his wife and son inside their farmhouse and sets the home on fire. David thinks he figures out what is going on in his quiet little town when he finds a government plane downed in the local marsh, but he discovers this too little too late. The government has already taken the town off the grid, and the people have started to go crazy. That's when the government moves in and sets the town up for quarantine. David, his wife Judy (Radha Mitchell), his deputy Russell, and Becca (Danielle Panabaker) try to escape whatever is going on.

"The Covenant" (2006)

This is the first time I've watched this. Let's hope it's the last. What, you don't remember "The Covenant"? There's a good reason for that. It is your typical generic teen supernatural action-horror that became all too popular in the mid-2000's trying to capitalize on the popularity of the likes of "Underworld".

The Cornetto Trilogy - "Shaun of the Dead" (2004), "Hot Fuzz" (2007), and "The World's End" (2013)

We have arrived at my favorite part of our entire collection - The Cornetto Trilogy! Sorry guys, only downhill from here.

"Cloverfield" (2008)

"Cloverfield" is one of those movies that no one ever thinks "that was okay." It's a movie you either love or hate. I count myself among the former rather than the latter. I absolutely love this movie, and it is probably my favorite monster movie.

Yes, I intentionally left the sticker that seals it closed on there. It looks so good!

"Child's Play" (1988) and "Curse of Chucky" (2013)

We're watching the first movie in the series - "Child's Play" - and the last movie in the series - "Curse of Chucky". I wish we had "Child's Play 2", but we don't. The other three are kinda disposable. These two, however, are pretty great movies. One, the debut of a terrific character in horror. The other, a very ingenious way of bringing the character back to his roots and giving him the chance of carrying on. We only actually own "Curse". We were able to watch "Child's Play" on Starz (which we somehow keep getting for free through our cable provider).

"The Cabin in the Woods"

Like we talked about yesterday, there have been a lot of cabin in the woods horror movies, but none of them accomplish what "The Cabin in the Woods" (2012) is able to do. Much like when we discussed "Behind the Mask" a couple weeks ago, this is able to take stereotypes and cliches, and make them mean something completely new. After seeing this, it made "Cabin Fever" mean something a bit more than what Eli Roth had intended.

"Cabin Fever"

"Cabin Fever" (2002) was basically the start of Eli Roth's tremendous career. In what has become his style, this movie contains some gruesome horror and almost unnecessary and out-of-place comedy. But that's Eli Roth for you.

I love this box art. Just the way the trees and the cabin form a skull looks great. 

"Bubba Ho-Tep"

Elvis Presley and John F Kennedy are both alive and living in a nursing home together. Things are awful for them, but they're about to get even worse. The souls of all the residents of their nursing home are in danger, and the threat is an Egyptian Mummy, come to absorb all these old souls that no one will miss. I present to you, the craziness that is "Buba Ho-Tep" (2002).

Broken Lizard Marathon!

That's right! We're watching all four of Broken Lizard's major motion pictures and in chronological order: "Super Troopers", "Club Dread", "Beerfest", and "The Slammin' Salmon". And all in one day!

"Black Swan"

We don't get many dramas in our collection. As you may have noticed, we like being entertained (or stupefied), and dramas can be a bit . . . dramatic. When I noticed that "Black Swan" (2010) was next (followed immediately by another terrific drama with Mila Kunis, "The Book of Eli"), I did a quick count of the dramas on our top two movies shelves. For the record, we're only about halfway through the top shelf right now. I counted about 5 or 6 dramas in the top two shelves. So to extrapolate those numbers out, we can say that in a collection of about 400 movies (give or take, we've never actually counted), we have maybe 15 dramas.

"Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon"

Next we're covering "Behind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon" (2006). This is an extremely polarizing movie. If you're into it,  you're all in. If you're not into it, this movie will never catch your attention.

"Alien vs Predator" & "Alien vs Predator: Requiem"

I wish we owned other Alien and Predator movies. We own "Prometheus" and "Predators", which we will be watching later on in the P's. So for now we're watching "AvP: Alien vs Predator" and "AvPR: Aliens vs Predator - Requiem" Yep, they seriously tried to trend the titles up by starting them with the acronyms. So the second one has TWO subtitles! Snazzy!

"As Above, So Below"

Every time I'm positive the "Found Footage Film" (FFF) genre has finally died, another one comes out which doesn't completely suck. "As Above, So Below" (2014) was one of those movies. It was a really good movie, but could have been significantly enhanced had it not been FFF. This review I want to do with as few spoilers as possible, since it is a thriller that depends on the unknown to scare you.

The box art is fantastic.

"An American Werewolf in London"

Next up is "An American Werewolf in London" (1981). There are not many movies quite like this one. And I think that's OK. This movie is a fantastic mix of horror and comedy. Not quite like "Zombieland" or "Army of Darkness". The comedy is a bit darker, which fits the plot so well. Believe it or not, this was written and directed by the director of "Animal House", which we'll be watching very shortly.

"Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter"

Based off a book of the same name, "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter" is the untold story of Abraham Lincoln's night job as a vampire hunter. It sounds ridiculous, but it is a rather fun movie. Most people wrote this off as a goofy and campy retelling of history, but it is not. There is no "goofy and campy", and is a solid action/horror movie. They manage to fit most everything that happens into his actual history, so nothing is as crazy as one might think.

"28 Days Later..." & "28 Weeks Later"

Well, didn't take us long to get into a double review post, did it? We're starting off strong with "28 Days Later...", and immediately ruining it with "28 Weeks Later". It's amazing how polarizing these two titles are.

Welcome to the Collection

The movie collection you have the pleasure of hearing my prattle on about. 

We love movies. And as you can see, we have a large collection of movies with varying degrees of quality and popularity. . We have our movies split up into several categories: Comics, Kids/Family, Muppets, Tolkien/Narnia/Star Wars, and Everything Else. We also have a pretty small anime collection and some TV series. Chances are I will not be reviewing either of those sections in this blog. All-in-all, we have somewhere around 400 titles.